Beauty in a World of Blurry

So I lie in bed every night before I go to bed, I take my glasses off, and I look up at these lights. I wish I could make my eyes take a picture so you guys could see them the way I see them through my eyes, but I don't want you ladies to have such bad eye sight like I have. I see light as weird circular... crystals? And they appear bigger than they seem! I don't even know how to explain it. I don't see their source, just the light in this beautiful form. And I lay here and just look at these light dots on the green mesh. It's like magic! Gorgeous lights just sitting there. And it's beautiful.

Now these are Christmas lights you would probably see outside since they're all white (or if you have an all white Christmas tree that's fine too... just.. never mind). When the lights are set up in a line like this, that's when they're perfect. If they're bunched up it's just a jumbled mess of oversized bulbs of light with no source. Christmas trees kinda scare me without my glasses...

I'm going to confess something to you hear. My biggest fear in this world is not spiders. It's not sharks or heights or anything like that. I have this deep fear that some day I may go blind. I fear I'll go blind before I get my chance to see this stunning world. Before I get to see my grandkids or kids for that matter. This is a far fetched dream, but I want to see the Earth from space, just one day. I'm slightly afraid of the dark. I keep a little light on at night still because I wake up in the dark and have that split second of fear before my eyes adjust and I can see my room. Every time I go to the eye doctor I learn that my vision has gotten worse. And one day I'm afraid the light will just go out.

These lights help me feel better about it all. I never thought I'd find anything beautiful or amazing about my bad vision. They proved me wrong.

So next time I scream bloody murder over a spider, keep in mind they are not my biggest fear.